I'll post what has worked for me.
1. I camped and deleted my character's ini file and the eq2_recent.ini.
2. I then logged back in and set every single chat window how I wanted it (forever).
From then on my chat windows work fine. I don't know if I still have the bug or not, but I now have forced it to save the current state that I like it at. If I were to change it in the future, I might have to repeat steps 1 and 2, I don't know yet.
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